After my "mini-crisis" I decided that it was time to get back to the basics. I have been doing a lot of Enochian work lately, mainly with the Seniors, and I thought it would be good for me to re-nourish myself with a Bornless Middle Pillar. (not that working with the Seniors is unourishing, but very ethereal and difficult to process) I wanted to concentrate specifically on the basics I learned with the regular Middle Pillar when I was a 0=0 since, from time to time, we get so enamoured by advanced magics, we forget about the power of the rubricks.
I began by taking a long time to sit in meditation and clear my mind. Even though I wanted to jump right into it, I made myself sit and wait until my Higher Genius told me to begin. As I sat and focused on my breath I went into a deep state of meditation. Then, without having to place the intention, the Kether sphere began to open up above me. Light began to shine down on me from above and envelope my whole being. A sense of calm peace and wholeness permeated throughout and I knew it was time. I stood up and began the Kabbalistic Cross, I focused with great intensity on my visulization and projecting the energy out into the universe, I continued with my banishings and other rites until it was time for the Middle Pillar.
I like to do my Middle Pillars sitting down, it helps me to focus more on my visualization. I preformed the exercise invoking and vibrating the proper Divine names, and circulating the Light throughout my being. I wanted to meditate on the words of the Invocation, which begins "I am the First and the Last", I read it first, to make sure I remembered the words, then sitting in my hightened state of awareness I let the words flow through my mind unceased by the material. Suddenly, I sensed that I was not in my body or in my self, but that I was in my Self, my True Self, the reflection of the Divine that is within me, this is known in the Western Mysteries as one's Higher Genius.
I saw and felt myself as the beginning of the creation of a universe, a ball of energy, with all the potential of the universe within me, contract, then expand exponetially! I then began to contract again, more slowly this time, until I was my original size...this cycle happened over and over again. It was breathtaking.
It was interesting for me to note that although a new universe was formed in each cycle, the old one was never completly destroyed, but instead used as the basis of the new universe. Thus, every universe was not only built on the ashes of the previous, but of every universe which had come before.
"Light in extension, Light rushing forth in one ray..." is what is said by the Hierophant in the 0=0
initiation. The Light never ends, it creates and uncreates itself, but it is never annihilated.